Blunk Drogging.

Not my fault!  See.  I was gonna make that tetrazzini and that lasagna again but......opps, guess we're going to the VFW for rib eye.  Know what?  I am not taking that meat out of the freezer until 5 minutes before Chuck says where's dinner.  I mean it! 

Tomorrow we meet with his son and wife and grandkids from Orlando.  So we are gonna see a movie?  Yeah, there's lots of interaction there, right?  I would have italicized that but I am too....ya know I only had 4 7 7's but Chuck says I had 7 but I didn't but if I did it would be like 7 7 7's. Say, wouldn't I win like $50,000 if that came up on a slot machine?   Kinda funny.  Get it?  I have to stay awake till this alcohol leaves myself or I might get sick.  Lucky for you I won't keep writing here.  I will go Opps.  Forgot what the rest of this sentence was sposed to be.  But anyway, Shellie and Mike got married in Vegas today.  She used to be a stripper and he used to be a millionaire till the law caught up with him.  I am happy for them.  They have 5 dogs.  I want 3 of them.  Hang on.  I want to insert a random picture here ok?  Well somehow it threw itself up there but who am I to criticize?  That sure as hell isn't spelled right.  Cna't find the spell check button or what ever so deal with it.  Look closely.  Is there mountains in that picture?  If so, it's probably my grandson in vegas.  Or not.  I don't think it's the Cubs.  Who knows.  I said random didn't I?  Well then quit cher bitchin.  I asked Chuck who is sleeping at the kitchen table while he is roasting bones in the oven for Maggie if I could take advil and he said yes.  He asked me to get one of the butter braids out of the freezer and he would make it tomorrow.  So I did.  I promised to obey, right?  Whateves.  I told you about going to the movies with the son and family, right?swdewfrgt;'t55555556 nnnnnn.  Maggie wrote that.  Truth.  She's and awesome little shit.  Hell, she's biting at my clothes right now!  Been awhile since a guy's done that to me.  But no, I am not weird and icky. 
Is it time for like a new paragraph?  Well.  Tjhis is a new one even though I didn't indent or skip a line or whatever a real person would do.  It's not like anyone can grade me.  Go ahead.  Try.  I will just ignore you.  I heard they might not teach cursive in schools anymore.  It's becoming obsolete?  Is that a word?  I know I am getting old.  I guess it's like our grandparents thinking we were so wild and stuff with all the gyrating/dancing, jeans and all.  But seriously.....Pluto is no longer a planet?  Can they just do that?  Telling Maggie to lay down and snapping my fingers but they won't snap.  WTF!
Sorry I was gone there for a minute.  Maggie wanted me to hold her in my lap.  She is now 7 months old. yup.  that's how big my lap is.  shut up!  at least I have a lap!!!!  Hey, there was a time I didn't.  I would try to cross my legs and they'd go....."your shittin' me, right?"  So....we good here?  Good.

Talk about Blood!

Maggie is super low key today.  She is bleeding alot more from her mouth.  It is either a broken tooth or a teething thing-which I doubt.  Hunter will call the vet as soon as they open tomorrow or he may just take her there.  She isn't hemorrhaging or anything but somehow my legs were all covered and the floors.  I clean it and there it is again.  But I am really, really concerned because she is so lethargic.  Black Labs run around like hell even if their legs are cut off!  I'm sure I will feel much better once I  know what's going on.  Hunter will be taking her hunting with him.  Are you kidding?  She is like an extra appendage.  And I like that he has love that he can accept.

I have a question for you.  I am not preaching nor am I looking for discourse or haters or people who judge.  This is just a curiosity on my part.  No one has to answer unless they choose.  I am a Christian and so.....I know my own deal.
Again, I am not looking to preach or convert or have anyone get into a "discussion" about this.  K?  I am not asking what your religion is or anything else but....
My question is for non-Christians.
I am curious to know what you believe about the afterlife.  What do you think happens after you die?

Just imagine what it will be like for me to be in control of the TV!  I am so excited!  Hunter watches the only one we have and it is always weird shit.  Even when he agrees to let me watch a certain hour long show....he is so noisy that it drives me crazy.  I have taken to holding the remote (no, not caressing it like a lover as he does)  and blasting the volume whenever he is making any noise.  The only voice he had is his outside voice.  Anyway....JOY!

Mini Meltdown.

LOTTA JOY - You were right about the denial.  Mine.
I wasn't feeling the best yesterday.    Went to bed at 11:15 pm.  Laid there for about an hour.  Body ached and I was all tensed up.  Mind busy with nothing in particular.  I prayed for sleep.  I tried to relax.  Then tears formed in my eyes.  I then realized I was thinking about Dawn and her family being evicted.  I got up, took two Xanax and two Anacin.  Made coffee and sat outside smoking, waiting for the meds to  take effect.  BTW, I never take two Xanax at once.  Then I am thinking about a couple shots of whiskey.  I thought about talking the puppy our of her kennel, sitting against the cabinet and just holding her for my own comfort.  Then I thought about this one knife we had that I am partial to.  Thought maybe I would take it in the bathroom and sit on the floor with it.  Just sit.  Thought about the fact that there aren't really any old-time razor blades...Then I saw the handgun sitting on Hunter's side of the kitchen table.  Hm....
These are just thoughts that pop into my scrambled, too full brain.  I can't control what goes on in there. I sat outside crying softly.  It was night time and sobbing could have disturbed some one's sleep.  Then the crying became interspersed with my own thoughts?  What thoughts.  Just needed to cry?  But it wasn't a cleansing cry.  It was more sorrow.  Sad about what?  Perhaps my worthlessness. 
I went to bed and Hunter asked me if I was OK.  He asked if I wanted him to get up with me, if there was anything he could do.  Asked if I wanted him to just hold me.  That starts me crying again.  I have a tendency to cry when someone is being genuinely nice to me.  He told me I should wake him when I get these feelings.  I cuddled up against him and he kept soothing me.  That eventually helped.  So I slept.  This morning he softly called up to me that it was a beautiful day if I wanted to come out and enjoy it or that I could go back to sleep. See?  This is the confusion in my marriage.  When he is gook, he is very, very good. I decide to get up.  It is beautiful.  I showered and put on real clothes instead of my ghetto, doesn't match, fake bra, I don't care "uniform."  He has my new sheets washed and on the clothes line.
My mind is still feeling a bit full.  Residual feelings perhaps?  I will get over it.  Last night was just a little scary for me, you know? 
Will change sheets.  Maybe work in the yard and clean house.  Will see if Hunter will take me to China Buffet for dinner.  Polish my nails.  Clean off the tables and get my new camera working.  A commenter asked our LAMB WHORE LEADER-SARA-if she was coming to northern Illinois.  Sara is a cleaning maniac.  If she is coming, I will invite her here also to help me.  Ha.  I should be so lucky.  Then there is JOEL  who is a jack-of-all-trades.  I could keep him busy for months.  My posts are beginning to be alot like MY NAME WAS FEMALE- not for those with short attention spans.  I l love her and her posts.  She is very dear to me.   If I could link to them, I would.  I haven't figured that out yet. I did, however, buy two books titled Computers For Dumb Old Fucks.  You people are my people.  I appreciate you all dearly.