Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Anger? I'll show you anger!

Be glad I didn't post this yesterday.  Would have even been worse in the morning after the visit to the vet.  He checked her over and made a few comments.  Then he asked it she'd gotten into some rat poison!  WTF!  I said no at the same time Hunter said yes.  I immediately started crying.  The vet came over and put his hand on my shoulder saying, "She'll be OK."  I said it wasn't that.  Told him I have sat down on the floor with dogs when they've been put to sleep and if fact I could even probably help operate.  Then since Hunter wasn't looking, I nodded my head in Hunter's direction and the vet got what I meant immediately.
Thank God she is also teething or we wouldn't have noticed the bleeding.  I also noticed she was extremely lethargic and going down 4 stairs was a struggle for her.  I would have taken her in for that reason alone but I am pretty sure he wouldn't have.  He'd just keep yelling at her and making her do what he told her too.  In fact, I would have called the vet immediately if I knew she's gotten into poison.  Seems rat poison thins your blood so that you have no ability to clot.  Hence....the blood.  I kept telling Hunter is was way too much blood but he called several of his  lovers  friends who said puppies bleed like that when they lose their teeth. Which, of course, I knew wasn't true.
They drew blood and she was very near to needing a blood transfusion.  Vet did give her a vitamin K shot to get her started and gave us pills to give her as well as instructions on how she should be cared for the next two weeks.  (Once the vet noticed I knew things and was asking him the questions...he started deferring to me.)   After that, Hunter changed his plans and isn't leaving until early to mid-week this coming week.
On the way home, Hunter said to me, "I'm not a villain, you know."  I was so angry and nauseous that I couldn't even talk to him.  At home he started saying whatever it was and I snapped.  I just snapped.  "Shut-up!  You are a fucking idiot!!!!!  I don't want to hear it!"
And every time he tried to say anything, I shut him down immediately, calling him a fucking idiot again and over and over as many times as I needed to.  He was shocked into silence.  First time ever! 
Having turned my anger inward for over 20 years....the dam finally broke.  'Bout time!!!  Anger?  You guys don't know anger like this.  Trust me.  Had I written this post yesterday it would have burst out into flames and damaged the computers of anyone who had attempted to read it.
On a positive note....depression is anger turned inward.  So yay me for lashing out.  And that is far too tame a phrase.  Words haven't been invented yet to express my feelings.  Anyway,
they wanted to see Maggie tomorrow (wed.) so I made the appt.  Then they called and said they want to check her blood work and clotting factor again today so we brought her in and they also want us to keep tomorrow's appt.  After that we don't go back for 5 weeks.  We were to keep her "down" - no walks - and in her kennel/crate for two weeks even after she seemed fine.  And Mr. direction follower -not- immediately started to take her for a little walk after we walked out the door of the vet's office.  I told him no.  Just let her pee right there in the grass.  Since we've been home, he has left her out of her cage to roam the kitchen.  She needs to rest!  She needs to avoid getting hurt. 
The vet we saw today called later and said we only need to keep her contained for one week from yesterday.  I am wondering if he will decide to leave the day after Halloween as originally planned.  Is it bad that I hope he does leave?
Enough for now.

It's later now. I forgot to thank all who responded to my question.  And I appreciate that you did so in the manner in which I had hoped.  I also respect those who chose not to answer.  You are all so awesome!

Oh.  And two more things....
Pray in whatever manner you do, that there will be a way for me to get to go see my son and his family in Vegas.  Hunter will not pay for me to go.  My kids are so desperate to see me that they have even offered to buy my ticket.  I can't let them do that.  They don't have discretionary income.   I would also be there with no cash so......
I was also "threatened" that if I didn't do something with the pumpkins like RIGHT NOW, Hunter would get rid of them.  So I took the basket and ribbon and flowers and pumpkins and gourds and make a beautiful display around my front porch lamp.  Or maybe it isn't so beautiful.  It was cold and dark as I sat on the cement doing this.  Will see tomorrow.

10 comments:

Kristy said...

I'm very happy you got very angry. Hunter is a f@ckin idiot. Made me mad that he is so selfish.

YeamieWaffles said...

I genuinely can't believe this Middle Child, that he could be so stupid. I mean I understand that he didn't want the cat fall ill but you're right, what he did was fucking idiotic and I'm so glad that you expressed your anger and used it in the right way on Hunter but hopefully things can sort out soon and that your pet will be okay because it cannot be fun living in that kind of environment.

Choleesa said...

You have no idea how happy I am to hear that you lashed out.

Do it more often...you'll be happier for it.

klahanie said...

Yay and about time you let it out!
Major respect, your way, Gary!!!

Rob-bear said...

I'll defer to the wisdom of the women, here.

I truly hope Maggie will be all right.

k2 said...

Glad you let your anger out! He should learn his lessons.

Furry Bottoms said...

It is very good you let your anger out. I can't believe he won't follow vet directions! I really hope Maggie will be OK.

Dazee Dreamer said...

Good for you. Keep telling that piece of dog poop off. It's the only way with freaks like him. phew, I guess I needed to get that off my chest.

Red Shoes said...

Bless your heart...

Yes, do speak up for yourself!!!

I'm so sorry...

~shoes~

My name WAS Female, I shit you not! said...

Reading THIS made me sick to the core. You can do anything to me, but when it comes to a defenseless child or animal....the gloves come off and my nails come out as yours did'
Anybody that can be that mean loses my respect!!!
The day WILL COME that finds you strong enough to say. "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!" Until then, know others care and wish only the best for you my sister/friend. (((hugs)))Pat