Sunday, June 13, 2010

Rain again?

Mowed just before the rain. Didn't want to but felt guilty as all the neighbors were out landscaping. Actually their kids were doing it for them. Have you noticed that all I seem to do is mow? What an exciting life. I woke with my usual, "What's the use. What's the point of living ?" and all that crap. I just don't get it anymore. Depression. And while it goes away, it also comes back and says to me that there is no reason for me to exist. I am nothing. I do nothing and I help no one. I really don't ever look forward to anything. I go and even enjoy myself at times. But I'd rather stay home alone having my own little pity party. TV is the best diversion. Yet I know it's stupid. I am not depressed about anyone or anything. What does God see in me?

5 comments:

Bossy Betty said...

Sorry you are feeling this way. Hope the depression lifts soon. I am thinking of you.

The Queen said...

Hey hey hey.. knock that shit off depression... middle child... YOU MAKE MY DAY BRIGHTER.. AND THAT COUNTS FOR A LOT....

you and I need to hang out.. he he.. pity party and gin.. we could rock the world...

Jimmy said...

Mowing, heck I look forward to it myself, it's a lot of work but it is my time to think without any interuptions and one thing about it is that after its done you can look back and see a job well done, the yard looks so much better and it is all because of you.

Take pride in yourself even a little thing like mowing the yard shows a lot about you and that little thing sure looks good.

Katherine said...

You are loved! :-)

Ms. A said...

I understand and sympathize!

Hikari