Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Well. That kinda sucks.

I am always lost in techno land.  I'm lost  IRL too.  Blogger is more alive than I am.  Is an aortic aneurysm bad?  Yeah.  I thought so.  I see a cardiothorasic/vascular surgeon on May 7th, I think.  I am a bit freaked out about it.  You know me. Normally I am not bothered about these things.  I don't think mine is quite big(?) enough for surgery.  Fuckin' Web M.D.  I drove myself to the ER when I needed emergency gallbladder surgery.  I almost drove myself when I ended up needing emergency hernia surgery but.....I kind of feel like I might need support this time.  Emotional support.  Yes.  I know that is a fictitious thing.  But wouldn't it be cool if emotional support was a real thing.  Like.... you could ask for it and BOOM,...it just appears.  I am afraid to mention all the health issues to Hunter cuz I think it will hurt my heart.  I know his words, thoughts and emotions.  Well.....at least I know his reaction to things.  Not good.  Not good at all.  So I will have to decide if and when I will tell him.
It's all good.  If  I explode and go to Jesus tonight,.....be happy for me.  Honestly.  Truly.
Not that I think that will happen.  I'm just saying.  So, yeah.  Will let you all know but I'll be talking to you before then.
You can pray for me.  I am sure I will be fine.  But pray more so that Hunter will man-up and be supporting and loving for me.  Hey!  I am right here.  I can hear you laughing.  But I know for a fact that pray works.

11 comments:

Coffeypot said...

I am a text, email, phone call away. You will not be alone.

Ms. A said...

I'm here.

Rob-bear said...

Those AAs can be nasty. One minute your fine; next minute, you're in trouble; next, you're dead. I hope yours is a long way from being anything other than a very small blip on the tubing.

Sorry about Hunter. Some people just cannot handle things.

Blessings and Bear hugs.

My name WAS Female, I shit you not! said...

My oldest son had what you have. It grew...he had the surgery to put a patch on his large weak spot on his aorta...he is just fine now. :0)
You too will be and from reading...I know that you know that!
Mainly it's emotional support from the people that we are closest to, we all need in times like these. Some people have a hard way of dealing with issues at hand and poo poo them ....they find this easier on themselves to deal with it that way. You have said that Hunter loves you, so I'm to thinking that this is his reaction when the going gets tough. He makes light of it. That's just his way of dealing with his emotions.
My hubby's first reaction would be to say...you are too mean to die. He too has always had trouble expressing what he really feels.
As any of us would be....you are scared of the unknown. You have your religion...embrace it and we all will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.(((hugs)))Pat

Kristy said...

Good thoughts and vibes sent your way. Thinking of you in your time of need.

Furry Bottoms said...

Emotional support is not a real thing? Or did you mean its not a tangible thing, as in something you can hold in your hands or see with your eyes?

This is why I love my semi-precious gem rocks. Like polished rose quartz. Fluorites, adventurines, etc etc. Not like the kind you put on a fancy ring, but it is something I can hold in my hand and it is very soothing to me. It came from nature and has its own energy. That is what makes God's love more tangible to me.

I sure hope you don't have an aneurysm and I'd like to give Hunter a taste of his own medicine!!! But that wouldn't be right, I guess.

Hang in there!!

TheLostWitch said...

Remember that it's the fear that we need in order to grow. You are amazing, putting this out here into the world. Sweet, peaceful thoughts going your way.

XO Suzy

Pearl said...

Whoa! New here, but isn't it just like me, to walk in on this kind of conversation???

Good luck to you. I hope you don't explode.

Pearl

ancient one said...

I hope Hunter surprises you this time and you can see and feel his love and support. I will pray that all goes well!

Susan said...

Oh Middle Child. So glad you are going to go to Jesus. Best place to be---in His loving care.

Good luck. I am hoping all will be okay.

Thanks so much for your visits to my blog and comments. Always so happy when you stop by.

I've had lots of techie problems but tonight, I posted! Hurray. susan

Gnetch said...

*Hugs*

You'll get through this. And don't believe Web M.D. It always tells me I'm gonna have cancer if I don't get checked by a physician.

Kidding aside, I hope you feel better. I really do.