Ancestry.com. and my wish

Saturday Hunter and I went over with his truck to help my daughter and her surly boys haul more stuff to their townhouse.  The initial idea was to combine the two units into one so they would only be paying for one.  We ended up just bring more stuff back into her already packed place. 
my wish......I wish I could "make" my daughter understand.  I wish I could fix their family.  I know it is too late.  The kids are already damaged and they are too old to wipe this from their minds.  Some might say I am a hoarder but I am not.  A hoarder is someone that buys and gets and refuses to let go of anything.  I have given so much away and gotten rid of.....all so Hunter can get his sofa and big TV.    But that's another story entirely which some of my followers can already probably tell without my writing it.  No.  My daughter is a hoarder.  Truly.  She insists that she can fit a huge, huge house worth of stuff-from her old house-into a tiny townhouse.  No amount of reasoning on my part can change her mind.  I know her shopping and stuff and Xanax are what she relies on to cope and feel good....at least temporarily.  She buys plenty of "food" but doesn't make meals.  When the kids (age 12, 15 and 17) ask, "What's for dinner?"  The always hear...."I don't know."  Once a week I could see.  She works 3 days a week, two of which are 12 hour days.  I have told her to make menus.  I have told her about making stuff ahead of time that can just be warmed up.  There's her crock pot.  She gets no respect from her kids and I can see why but it makes for a vicious cycle.  I wish I could fix them.  An uncluttered house is so much easier to maintain and good for your soul.  Don't spend all your money on crap you don't need and then say you don't have the money to repair your only working vehicle.  I have offered to come help clean her house.  I have offered to come help her go through things.  She doesn't take me up on my offer.  Her husband is gone six weeks at a time and comes home for one week.  Then goes back for 6 weeks, etc.  The kids-who used to light up like Christmas trees when I was coming for a visit-don't seem to care whether I come or not.  I think my oldest grandson who is going to be 18 in April, will be leaving home before he is done with his senior year of high school, though he will continue going.  I truly believe my grand daughter has a genius IQ.  Would like to see her be tested.  Her vocabulary and understanding of things that many older people are just now learning is amazing.  But this brings with it an attitude of superiority which is totally inappropriate.  And very unbecoming.  I can't help and it is killing me.  When I look at the situation.....there is such an easy solution, unlike drugs or alcohol illness.  I can do nothing but pray and love, whether it is acknowledged or not.  But I come home sooooo depressed.

Ancestry.....I have traced my roots back to Rip Van Winkle.  That's right!  Saturday after we got back from my daughter's.....I had to lay down at 5:30 PM.  I figured just a couple hours.  Well, I slept until 4 AM, got up to pee, had a cigarette and went back to bed until 7:30 AM.  You do the math.   That is my 2nd best.  My best was 14 hours.  BTW, that was not a drug induced sleep.

I need to have my Thyroid function tested again.  The Dr, put me on Synthyroid due to nodules but never checked to see if it was the right amount.  Oddly, as soon as I was put on the medication.....my depression lifted like rain clouds.  I was tired but figured it was a good trade.  Now my depression is creeping back in, perhaps in a different way but it's back none-the-less.  In the mean time...I have and appt. with my psychiatrist for a med. check and will have her up my Xanax to what it had been.  Then Wed. I have a repeat mammogram with possible ultra-sound.  Usually I go every year but this is a 6 month repeat cuz there was a little something they want to keep an eye on.

Wishing you Peace and Joy and whatever else it is that normal people feel.

nd whatever this big words, little words is about, I couldn't tell you.

Hotter than Hell?

I'm guessing hell is hotter.  100 degrees last week, 97 degrees today and 90's all this coming week.  And yes.  John and I are going to the flea market.  Hunter is going to babysit Tebow I know there is at least on large airconditioned building.  I like to take my cart so I don't have vision out of one to carry stuff.  What a difference that makes.  But with the crowd of people inside - I can't imagine anyone setting up outside today - I think the cart will get in the way.  I will carry a backpack as will my son.  I worry about him in the heat.  Ever the  mother, right?  It will be difficult with his limited vision.  He does quite well and you might not even notice it but he has only about 1/4th or 1/5th of vision out of one eye and none out of his other.  The problem is with his depth perception and he certainly has no periferal vision.  So the crowds of pushy people might piss him off.  I know if he was with his wife, he would hold her hand.  I'm thinking he will put his hand on my shoulder.  The word of the day is.......WATER.  Oddly, I can't think of anything I need or want.  But despite the heat, I am excited.  To spend the day with my son is the best thing ever.  He and I are so much alike in humor and he is as easy-going as I am. 
Again......it is amazing to go through my house without needing a compass to find our way through the maze of shit.  I have a ton of stuff to go through yet but this time......it's all going to Goodwill.  It is so easy and the guys there are amazing!  Easier still is the fact that you can haul it all there in your rubbermaid totes and get those back. 

Monday we will be going to meet up with Matt, Deb and two of our other grandkids.  It should be interesting.  Hope we can at least get them out of the water long enough to be able to play mini-golf and go to dinner.    It's about a 2 1/2 to 3 hour drive for us and we plan to come back the same day.

Sorry for any typos.  Spell check doesn't work weekends.  So.  I am just checking in here.  Hope you are all well, and for anyone involved in the floods, heat, wildfires and any type of illness', God Bless you.  I pray for health and happiness.  Peace.